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her repulse me with double scorn; thereby re…exciting every turbulent impulse of my nature。
I would fain exercise some better faculty than that of fierce speaking; fain find nourishment for some less fiendish feeling than that of sombre indignation。 I took a book—some Arabian tales; I sat down and endeavoured to read。 I could make no sense of the subject; my own thoughts swam always between me and the page I had usually found fascinating。 I opened the glass…door in the breakfast…room: the shrubbery was quite still: the black frost reigned; unbroken by sun or breeze; through the grounds。 I covered my head and arms with the skirt of my frock; and went out to walk in a part of the plantation which was quite sequestrated; but I found no pleasure in the silent trees; the falling fir…cones; the congealed relics of autumn; russet leaves; swept by past winds in heaps; and now stiffened together。 I leaned against a gate; and looked into an empty field where no sheep were feeding; where the short grass was nipped and blanched。 It was a very grey day; a most opaque sky; “onding on snaw;” canopied all; thence flakes felt it intervals; which settled on the hard path and on the hoary lea without melting。 I stood; a wretched child enough; whispering to myself over and over again; “What shall I do?—what shall I do?”
All at once I heard a clear voice call; “Miss Jane! where are you? e to lunch!”
It was Bessie; I knew well enough; but I did not stir; her light step came tripping down the path。
“You naughty little thing!” she said。 “Why don’t you e when you are called?”
Bessie’s presence; pared with the thoughts over which I had been brooding; seemed cheerful; even though; as usual; she was somewhat cross。 The fact is; after my conflict with and vict
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